There

You thought you knew me well

Hell I thought you knew me too well

But in between my daydream

In between my tangled lost mind on the ride

In seconds of my loneliness 

I remembered things that happened to me

The other harassment, my ex’s song, a weird drink

And those seconds, I wish I could tell you

Like how I used to

Just text you randomly to tell random things

And somehow it’s not weird 

It felt good. Like the stimulation on my brain is met.

But now I just have to keep it in and produce weird dreams.

Oh well, this is one of those lost thought on a gojek ride.

Happy Ending?

Half past midnight my mind went abroad.

I thought of songs that have one thing in common;

“If the world is ending…”

I guess it makes sense.

If everything’s ending and nothing else matters,

I imagine, that’s when everyone stripped down.

No more social classes, the rich and the poor, status and fame, age gap, the healthy and the sick. 

Whatever you’re wearing, wherever you live, whomever with — everyone would be wiped out.

No exception.

Then it hit me hard.

Days after, my fellow asked me:

“What would you do if you knew that the world is ending in 2 days?”

I was startled. 

I worked hard to get to where I am today.

I’m not ready to let go.

I didn’t even go to Japan, or skydiving.

And then I thought about my parents.

Can I get a ticket to J town when everything’s ending? 

Do I have time?

Also, will I be contacting someone to hug him for the last time?

And why am I not sure who that someone is?

Then I realize that I have been making decisions all my life, based on man-made things;

Money, fame, status, physique — hedonism, materialism. 

I do see intentions too, brain, heart, and chemistry.

But after all, I’m no Dakota, and they’re neither Chris Evans nor Pedro Pascal.

Am I materialistic? Am I shallow?

“I’d try heroine, and then go on, have the best coffee and all that.”

She broke my tangled mind situation with a laugh.

Well I guess that makes sense too.